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I think I'm really excited starting my course. I've been looking through all of the course material before my first lecture tomorrow and Its been giving me a weird feeling.

Because the stuff is interesting enough, if a little introductory at the moment, but It's like my brains learnt to have this reaction to seeing learning material if that makes sense? I think I'm so wired to hate this stuff that it's triggering that part of me, at least I hope that's what it is.

But the workload seems really managable. Which was really my main concern about doing any teritary stuff is that it would dominate my life. Stop me from doing everythign else that was important. This way I can keep chipping away at the rest of my life for the next few years while still working on the career stuff.

I wonder what little me would think of it. Definitely not what I was thinking of, I was dead set on being a concept artist or an adjacent comercial arts worker of some variety for so many years. It's funny how obvious turning your passion and hobby into your job seems until you actually do it. I really don't know how people do it as a career. Like I'm incredibly glad people get paid for the art they make, but I don't know people can live turning that part of themselves into a money making machine. Maybe other people can do one without losing the other, I don't know. But that was certainly my experiences, short as they may be. I'm still trying to find the love I had for it.

So stream of conciousness writing is probably going to be a mainstay so thank you for being so respectful in my head while you were here.

Warmly, Saoirse